Thursday, October 18, 2007

Enter The Dragon!


This story was spotted in today's edition of The Sun. And we thought that the local papers were fooking full of shite & devoid of any useful information. . . tsk tsk





(Please note pix are from Fer Fook's Sake personal collection & not from The Sun)
Press Digest by Kong See Hoh
Just when married Chinese women thought they can heave a sigh of relief now that the govt has turned down requests to import maids from China, they have to contend with a new threat - mistresses from China.
To be precise, they are mistresses for hire and are fast becoming a hit with roving males in small towns in northern peninsular Malaysia. According to a report in Oriental Daily News, these women, who are mainly from southern China, can be hired at RM2,000 a month.
Their "invasion"of mainly smaller towns in Perak and Penang began a few months ago and their presence - many turning up at eateries still in their nighties for breakfast - turns heads and is a hot subject of gossip among the rather conservative folk. According to the report, these mistresses, aged between 25 and 30 and pretty on the average, troop into the country on social visits visas with the help of a 'Big Sister'- a mistress for hire turned "agent".
The Big Sis show would-be sugar-daddies pictures of these women and after they have made their pick, arranges for them to fly in. The women pay for their way here but after the "affairs", the sugar-daddies would pay for their ticket home.
Apart from having to return to their love nest at the end of the day, they are free to work for extra income at nightspots but are not allowed to engage in sex. A contractor told the daily he got to know a Big Sis through a friend who had engaged her services. He said Big Sis showed him a stack of pictures of pretty Chinese women and told him he just had to make his pick and the woman of his choice would be in M'sia to meet him within a month.
He was told he needed only pay RM2,000 a month as pocket money to the mistress and provide her with a place to stay.


Fer Fook's Sake has a few questions though - what does the reporter mean by "pretty on the average"? So-so only? Most of them average looking? On average they are mostly pretty?
Is there a money back guarantee if chosen mistress does not match pix quality?
Can we place her in a shed as a living quarters? Hole in the ground toilet (just like in China) can or not ?
Is Puchong considered a "small town"?
Since I've given up tobacco & booze, RM2000 a month seems like a decent deal, rite fellas? . . . Oh, hello, wifey. . . crash, bang, wallop!!! . . . (chair breaking) . . . (glass smashing) . . . (bones cracking) . . .
Sorry, Siaran Tergendala

Mrs Fer Fook's Sake would like to apologise fer the sudden loss of transmission. This blog will be temporarily be out of commission as blogger learns to use his limbs again . . .

24 comments:

senorita.. said...

i just read this news on The Sun and here u are,posting it again.....

mistress for a month for RM2k... if i'm a guy,i'll definitely go for it.. i think it's reasonable and it's only for a month... *opps..i really shudn't encourage this...

JonC said...

Whoa! Unker, you trying to put ya money saved from not indulging in your normal vices to some other kind of vice ah? :0P

Macam buying some shop tv kinda thingy lah. Money back guarantee and satisfaction guaranteed. Purely business and pleasure eh? Hehehehe

Cynnister said...

Oh dear, Unker, you only lost use of your limbs? The Mrs is too kind.

Why pay for it? Just choose ugly ones and maybe can get for free.

senorita.. said...

is it really possible for a man to stay and stick to a woman for his whole life? yes i think it is.. but some men cannot. so how? in this case,if the wife allows the husband to have a lil' bit of fun outside,would it make matters worse or..? but then again i think it's not feasible.. coz the husband will want to have the 'lil' fun' again n again n again...

if u don't understand what i've said,just forget abt it. =)

JonC said...

Need to side track a bit. I wouldn't mind having a hot lookin' mechanic like the one in pic no.2 working on me engine! ;0)

Ok now back to the topic at hand. I can't afford to even sustain myself let alone to fund some *ahem* extra curricular activities. :0P

anfield devotee said...

Jon C: Yup, u read me mind. Hot mechanic to look after me cars would do just fine . . .

senorita: u r treading on very thin ice here . . . he he

cynnister: jokes aside, what a brilliant piece of reporting. Talk bout human drama!
And what's da deal with the kampong towns, not exactly filled with condos fer that discreet love nest, rite?

Am talking to wifey & trying to convince her to adopt the "hot mechanic in undies" look just fer moi!

senorita.. said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
senorita.. said...

haha

what did yr wife say? yes or no..? lol

premo said...

AF: Muahahahaha! I think the funniest comment here was the non-comment posted by a certain author "This post has been removed by the author." What happened la dei... PUSSYcat got your tongue! Hehehe...

anfield devotee said...

premo: he was probably gonna share a "Big Sis" contact with us but backed out . . . he he

senorita: what do you think!?! Haven't given up though. Persistence is the key ie annoy the hell outta her until she agrees!

JonC: Think of her as yer personal maid to do yer laundry, cooking etc. Plus you get extra services on top of that. I think RM2k quite ok la, bro. Stop drinking la then can afford. Don't worry bout the accomodation since u r single, just ask her to move in with you!

Mark said...

Not that I'm married and I'd know but at RM 2,000 a month, that's cheaper than maintaining a real wife isn't it?!?! Muahahaha.

Mark said...

Oh just to add. For RM 2,000 a month, at least this wife maintains herself... for the sake of business at least. Muahahhaa.

Mark said...

I hope not many women read your blog mate and if they do, please let it be known that "mark" is just an alias.

senorita.. said...

hahahaha.. but seriously,i think if i'm the wife,i will let my husband have "her".. its jus for a month rite..? it might just spice things up..(in d bedroom.. =P) plus,i get another "maid".. haha

redgav said...

senorita : If only all women think like u! yes, tell yr wifey or gf that u hired a maid to help around d hse and when she's not looking...........

I hv actually heard of stories like this before. In Indonesia, the same services can be obtained for a fooking 1 million rupiah, or abt RM400 plus! Donno whether u need to provide accom 4 them or not tho! For Jonc and AD(An Devotee), you can dress them in more than just mechanics!

As for Mark, hire one and still got RM1600 to spare! Not bad deal wat!

redgav said...

By the way, also want to mention that I think England deserve wat they got on Wed. They are still a bunch of over-rated players internationally. It's amazing how the Russians managed to control the game and pass the ball so well, plastic pitch or not. Looks like it is bye-bye McLaren!

I guess another supposedly "golden generation" of English footballers will probably pass now without winning a title, just like the Portuguese of Figo's era!

Bernard said...

"Please note pix are from Fer Fook's Sake personal collection & not from The Sun)"

What I'd like to know is, what other pix you have in your errr, 'Personal Collection'?? Are they PG-13 or XXX? Does your wifey know about this collection? I suppose she should know by now!

On the subject, firstly whether the woman is pretty or not is a very subjective matter and what one considers pretty may be someone else's butt ugly.

As far as the price tag is concerned, RM2K is indeed cheap for a mistress with the only other condition being to provide lodging. But as with many a tale I've heard before, there will surely be other expenses not stated such as gifts, shopping trips, outings etc which will certainly add to the bill.

The fact that they are only here for a month will surely mean many of them will want to milk their benefactor or cash cow to the hilt before they bugger off back. Yes they can get other work in the mean time but how much do you think they'll earn in the 1 month doing 'other jobs' if no sex is involved?

& AD, 1. you deserve the beating & 2. your health condition does not permit you to have any such mistress, even if you can afford them, nor getting your wifey to dress like a tart.

Senorita: you must surely be the dream girl for any itchified husband. But no woman I know will countenance having to share the man of their life with someone else, even for a month. If you say "...but its only for a month..." then you are mistaken as after that 1st month, he'll surely want another & another...so where will it end?

Saintly Unker Bernard
(you can almost hear the hymns playing in the background...) ;)

anfield devotee said...

mark lee @ Becky: Shit, RM2k is less than yer monthly drinking bill la, nevermind real wifey. Like I told JonC, trade in drinking fer a mistress la. Or u can do alternate months. jan - mabuk, feb - mistress, etc until dec - dapat BONUS do BOTH!!!

senorita: "spice things up in the bedroom"? Eh, menage a trois? Jahat la lu!

Saintly Unker Bernard: "Hidden costs"? Sounds like someone is a bit too clued in to be "saintly". Was it you who wanted to share a Big Sis contact with us but deleted it!?! He he

redgav: Fook england la. At least portugal's golden generation played some thrilling footie at Euro1996 & made final of last one.
Shall we all move to Indonesia?

senorita.. said...

"menage a trois" is okay if it's not a permanent thing.. and of course the wife must also understand that when she agrees with this arrangement,she must not feel jealous o anything because the husband WILL always prefer the "other" girl FIRST... ;P

and on another perspective,it's better than him going for prostitute/keeping a mistress secretly behind the wife's back rite?

and of the subject that the husband will want more after the "trial 1 mth",i guess it's natural for the husband to behave like that... ntg that the wife can do...

so in conclusion,although i'm ok with the idea,it's still best not to give any consent for fear of future complications... =)

anfield devotee said...

senorita: waaah, mr teh teng hock, better ask around to see if anybody knows any Big Sis. U seem to have got implicit permission here. Well done & congrats (cue thunderous applause!).

JonC said...

Wah i didn't know such open chick like Cik Senorita exists in Malaysia lar. :0P Apa lagi En. Teh, sudah dapat permit / visa!!!!

Suddenly got halo over unker Bernard's head pulak!!!!

weiyin69 said...

well, if you read chinese papers, you see this sort of stories all the time! all those gatal males are very excited now i suppose.

if a guy needs to stray from his wife using such a "service", well i don't have much to say about him. perhaps he will be open-minded enough if his wife engages such a service too ...

goes both ways doesn't it?

senorita.. said...

*wonder if there's any Big Bro around.. hmmmm*

i wan,Daniel Agger/Torres lookalike.. Quaresma pun boleh =P

anfield devotee said...

Wei Yin: I knew this aunty would say something like this. Hence the popularity of "swinger" parties. Apparently there are quite a few even in KL.

But on a serious note (seriously), this is a problem as RM2K isn't much fer many Chinamen. Many of em gamble away that much in a month anyways, so this will lead to some marriages breaking down. I mean, what chance do many older women have against rivals half their age?

I suppose one weapon the female spouse has is to call the immigration dept & get these Dragon Ladies deported.