Wednesday, January 30, 2008

A Toxteth Tale

I was tagged by Tuan Kerp to say me two sen's worth on the much trumpeted (but rarely practised) concept of Muhibbah. I have mentioned before despite me frequent postings on race relations, I am not some rabid extremist Macha. I can proudly say I have close friends from various races & we all get together to share a few laughs over a beer or two. Yes, even me Melayu-jahat (most of em anyways) friends drink; alcohol is kinda of a social glue that bonds us all together.

Anyways, I digress. I'd like to share a tale or two with you which me thinks highlights the concept of muhibbah. Although it was a few years ago & me was then a young, long-haired metalhead studying in Liverpool, it still resonates with me till today.

In me final year, I was living in the seriously fooked-up ghetto section of Merseyside known as Toxteth (rent was cheap). Me flatmate & meself were the only two non-Malay residents in an apartment block filled with loads of Bumi students.

Story 1:
So every Friday evening, the Malaysian contingent would gather at the plastic turf pitch (the same one where Robbie Fowler honed his skills!) behind our apartment blocks fer a kick about. I got to know most of the Malay students here & always had a good laugh. In particular, there was this Kelatanese guy who was very amiable and friendly. Then one day I found out he had casually asked the other guys, "Apo namo Bala?"

"Bala la," came the reply. "Tok, namo Melayu dia," he asked again. The other guys chuckled & told him me full name & that me really was a Macha, not Melayu (me mixed blood heritage means I am more chocolate than Guinness)! Guess what, the amiable & friendly Kelantanese fooking stopped speaking to me after that . . .

Story 2:
Me & me mates took turns cooking & since most of the other diners were Moslem, I made sure all food stuff were purchased from the Halal butcher store. One such store was run by this pak cik sailor (there were quite a few in Liverpool) who never returned after the war.

So one fine fooking day, I was there waiting fer him to chop me bird, he makes small talk. Telling me how I need to study hard & do well in me exams . . . so far, so good . . . coz as a Malay I needed to go back & reclaim Tanah Melayu from the dastardly Cina & Keling!!! Fooking hell, I was at boiling point but held me tongue as this was an old man & didn't want to tell him to fook off (in hindsight, I should have).

I recounted me experience with me other Malay friends who saw the funny side of the story but nonetheless, in a show of solidarity, decided to boycott the racist muthafooker. Considering the pak cik's shop was the closest & most convenient Halal butcher to us, I was quite touched that they saw a need fer affirmative action against a fellow (ex-)Malaysian.

Anyways, here's are two sides of the coin that to me show the kind of polarisation we face. On the one hand, there are those narrow-minded fookers who only befriend their own kind. But all is not lost as there some who can still see thru the bullshit.

ps: Sorry fer the long-winded tales. Please feel free to share yer own experiences by posting in the comments box.

pss: JonC & Bernard Chong, you have been tagged. Please do write about this topic in yer respective blogs (on me blog roll).

Monday, January 28, 2008

Same old, same old . . .

Just when the govt was trying to make concessions to the Indian community & try win back some of its vote, along comes a bigot to underline the deep schisms that now run within our society. And am I thankful fer the actions of En Kamaruzaman (below) lest the multitudes of "grateful" Indians forget just how fooking far we have been left behind & what sort abuse we are open to.

What am I talking about? Well, I received these smses over the weekend & I leave it to you to judge fer yerself. As fer the veracity of its contents, again yer call but it doesn't suprise me one iota that this is true. Even if it isn't, we recently had some wakils calling fer the removal of the crosses adorning some missionary schools . . .

1st sms
Indians have been victimised again! SMK Anderson Ipoh teacher, En Kamaruzaman, made some Indian boys cut their religious wrist-strings & ordered them to shave although they protested it was for Thaipusam, with parents letter. He also uttered 'Ini agama syaitan'.

2nd sms
Confirmed with Pengetua just now. Its true, incident in SMK Anderson Ipoh about the teacher Kamaruzaman said to Indian students 'agama syaitan'. Please call to protest to the school management now!

Pengetua : 019-5083883
PK: 012-5763592
PKHem: 012-5137685
Pej: 05-2494900

Pls sms your protests to all!

The smses above were reproduced verbatim. Fer Fook's Sake urges all concerned Malaysians to voice their protest at this display of unbridled racism. Yes, there are racists everywhere but that don't mean we have to fooking tolerate it, especially when he is entrusted with the education of the future generation.

Hope this fooking wanker of an educator meets with an unfortunate accident. As the old adage goes, the only good racist is a dead racists . . .

Friday, January 25, 2008

Money talks, bullshit walks . . .

"My home is my castle. Being the king of my castle, I can do & say whatever I want."

"I get high after after two glasses of wine. I tend to talk rubbish."

"Sorry to say, I was just bragging and bullshitting. In my house I can claim to talk to Pres Bush if I want to."

- the venerated Datuk VK Lingam explains his tele "conversation"

Fer Fook's Sake says: Why didn't you say so earlier, Datuk? Could have avoided the proverbial shit hitting the fan scenario if only you spoke up earlier. Of course, yer answers to the commission answers everything. Case closed!

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

A small concession

Who says marching & public protests don't bring results?!?

Whilst its a small (& let's make no mistake, it is a minuscule) concession to make Thaipusam a holiday in KL & Putrajaya, tis clear evidence that BN are trying hard to woo back the disconcerted Indian vote.

Machas have been asking fer Thaipusam to be declared a public holiday fer yonks & considering the amount of tourist ringgit the occasion brings in; it was the least BN could do. But you see, BN had always treated its Indian supporters with fooking impunity.

But the recent show of discontent has made the BN realise they have lost plenty of ground with this group of loyal supporters (dungus?). And fer those who still believe the dailies who claim only 4,000 hooligans turned up fer the Hindraf march, you can be sure the BN would not have blinked an eye fer that number.

Fact remains BN are on a charm offensive in light of impending polls. Do your bit & not be seduced by the scraps & morsels the BN are throwing at us. Focus on the fact that the parties responsible fer unbridled corruption (eg Port Klang Free Zone) & judicial tampering (eg VK & Adnan) are still free men. Remember that we need to send a strong signal to BN that their days of doing whatever the fook they want is over.

ps: To all me Hindu brethren, may your prayers be answered during Thaipusam. For the rest of you guys, enjoy the day off (courtesy of Hindraf, NOT BN) . . .

Friday, January 18, 2008

Question time

Firstly, to the non-footie fans who take the time to visit me blog, thousand apologies fer all the latest postings being bout LFC. But the crisis @ Anfield has left me (& many other Kopites) with plenty to say. So please endure fer awhile longer.

So on with business.

Latest rumour has the DIC preparing a deal worth 350m sterling pounds. Some reports suggests that the Yanks are also under fire from the board fer zee German PR disaster.

Another article in the UK papers say the Yanks refinancing plans have little to do with the so-called credit crunch but rather opposition from within the club to be saddled with such a huge fooking debt.

This raises a few issues which I have listed below. Please leave yer answers in the comments box as I'd love to hear what other Kopites (& other genuine footie fans) think:

1) Will DIC be a better option than the fooking Yanks?
a) No, DIC is a business too
b) Yes, the Sheik is filthy fooking rich & can take us to the next level
c) They canna be worse than the Yanks
d) Uncomfortable that LFC is in foreign (ie non-Scouse) hands

2) Whoever the owners are, should Rafa stay?
a) Yes, he is integral to our future
b) No, he is fooking lost the plot
c) Yes, coz there are no suitable candidates in the market
d) Should be given another season

3) Ideal replacement?
a) Bruce Fooking Arena
b) Jose
c) Lippi
d) Toshack

4) Do we really need a new stadium & all its attendant financial implications?
a) Yes, look at the dividends Arsenal are getting
b) No, Anfield is irreplaceable
c) Absolutely, too few seats, too many fans
d) Not worth the fooking hassle

Me own answers are 1) b, 2) b, 2) d (surprise, surprise!) & 4) b. Look forward to hearing yer comments.

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

The American Dream . . .

Spent the entire morning trawling thru various LFC blogs & British newspaper reports. Sigh . . . all of em make fer fooking depressing reading. Its all fooked up, thanks to the wonderful intervention of a couple of suvvern cowboys.

Hope those bigoted Liverpool fans who initially shuddered at the thought of handing control over to DIC & were too quick to embrace the American dream (& all its attendant fooking bullshit) learn a valuable lesson here.

Fer those who haven't had the time to read about the chaos engulfing the Anfield house of cards, read the article below. You won't be smiling if you are a Kopite. It's all fooked me friends, all fooked . . .

Liverpool's US dream turns to nightmare
by Andy HunterTuesday January 15, 2008 from the UK's broadsheet The Guardian

Tom Hicks and George Gillett provided plenty of ammunition to sceptics of the American takeover of Anfield last February (of which there were precious few) with talk of franchises, Liverpool Reds and goal-tenders but it was their considered and frequent description of themselves as mere "custodians" of a £218.9m investment that resonated loudest with the club's support, even as the institution that is England's most successful club was heading for foreign ownership.

Appeasement and ambition were their overriding objectives as they were introduced in the Anfield trophy room by the chief executive, Rick Parry, who, with the departing chairman and then majority shareholder, David Moores, had helped clear the path by vouching for the credentials of men who promised openness and to "earn the respect of the fans".

Given that Hicks and Gillett had to purchase compulsorily only 1.4% of the club's shares over the next 21 days, the message was evidently taken on trust. How different the picture looks 11 months on.

It says everything about the Liverpool co-chairmen's standing among that same support today that Tom Hicks' revelation that he spoke to Jürgen Klinsmann about replacing the popular Rafael Benítez was not the only bad news to emanate from Texas. As far as the vast majority are concerned, Hicks' insistence that neither he nor his business partner is interested in selling Liverpool to Dubai International Capital is a further, demoralising blow.

"The speculation in the London tabloids on Sunday morning is more rubbish," said Hicks in an extraordinary interview with the Liverpool Echo yesterday, attempting to perpetuate the myth that it is a southern media conspiracy that is destabilising the club. "George and I have no interest in meeting with DIC or selling our shares to them. We are amazed at how silly rumours find themselves in print in the tabloids." This from a man who claimed he approached Klinsmann only on the basis of press rumours about Benítez's discontent, and who staged the meeting in the same week the Spaniard brought their rift over transfer policy into the public domain.

Whether honesty, fear that the meeting with the next Bayern Munich coach would be made public or a considered effort to push Benítez closer to the exit fuelled Hicks' admission is unclear but the Kop's anger and discontent are not.

A concerted effort was made by the organisers of the pro-Benítez march last November to avoid anti-US sentiment and to concentrate on support for the man who has delivered two Champions League final appearances in his three full seasons at the club. Yet that feeling is growing as Liverpool's absentee owners act with continued disregard for the traditions and heritage they vowed to protect.

Save for a carefully scripted statement issued after they met Benítez following the defeat by Manchester United on December 16, Gillett has maintained a public silence on the manager's future. His presence at Hicks' retreat in southern California for the meeting with Klinsmann, however, indicates it is not just the more vociferous Texan who harbours doubts over the Spaniard's title-winning credentials. And what might they have heard from the former Germany national team coach last November that prevented an agreement with their "insurance policy"?

That Liverpool require time and more signings of the calibre and expense of Fernando Torres to sustain a genuine challenge for the Premier League? If so, Klinsmann's advice would have been identical to what they have heard consistently from Benítez.

Hicks and Gillett are not close to selling Liverpool to DIC, as weekend reports suggested. Should they succeed in securing a £350m loan to refinance their takeover and fund the first stages of the proposed stadium on Stanley Park before the end of February, then the pressure to seek outside help for their ambitious project also diminishes. Such is the rising anger at their reign, however, the pressure to sell could eventually come from Liverpool supporters and not the Royal Bank of Scotland, which funded the takeover.

Despite Hicks' dismissal of the DIC stories, the Americans did hold talks with the Dubai company about acquiring a 15% stake last October. The deal was close to completion until Liverpool's owners valued the club at £1bn - accounting for a completed stadium - and DIC refused to pay £150m for 15% of an investment they hoped to buy outright only eight months previously. DIC's interest remains.

Tonight's FA Cup replay with Luton should be about the League One club's desperate plight and Jamie Carragher's 500th appearance for Liverpool. The distractions will linger until either the Spaniard or the Americans walk on.

ps: How's that fer sobering reading? As usual, comments from genuine footie fans (& not mud-slinging wankers) are welcomed.

Sunday, January 13, 2008

Lost cause

Last night's match v Boro was depressing viewing indeed. The turgid performance (yes, another one) was a clear indication that Rafa has lost the plot & the dressing room at that. A sad state of affairs. Five years seems to be the new statutory limitation on managerial progress @ Anfield.

After the initial triumph of Istanbul of 05 & the FA Cup in 06, there was real optimism that we would at least be challenging fer the league at some stage. Instead, Rafa & his huge fooking (& expensively assembled) squad has contrived to emulate Houllier's last stand.

Halfway thru the season & these are some of the "memorable" displays - v Spurs (h), v Pompey (a), v Porto (a) , Marseille (h), v Besiktas (a), v Birmingham (h), Wigan (h), Man City (a) & this is not counting our lucky wins v Derby (a) & v Blueshites (a). Fooking bollocks!

As fer the eternal optimists & Rafa-loyalists out there, don't even start with the "this season has the hallmarks of another 2005". Please don't be delusional. Inability to beat Mighty Luton Town hardy ever transalates into triumph over Inter.

Last nite, it was painfully clear how lacking in talent we are. Yes, Torres scored a wonder goal but Voronin? Aberloa? Even the redoubtable Riise & Finnan both looked uninterested. Alonso is a shadow of his former self. The castle to our supposed kingdom has crumbled due to inferior building materials. And Rafa the architect will have to take the blame.

The writing's no longer on the wall. It's been graffitied onto the psyche of all right-thinking Kopites - time to go Rafa . . .

ps: If Juve want to pay 10m fer Momo (one of four holding midfielders in our squad), shouldn't we accept & use the money to bid fer Anelka to partner Torres?

Wednesday, January 9, 2008

Good statistics

January is a busy time at me workplace. Its fresh intake of students at the College & I meself have been busy checking out the talent. Helping pretty young things is a invigorating reason to come to work every day.

The nursing dept is one of the bigger faculties at the College & have noticed a few guys in the white uniforms spoiling me vista. Call me old fashioned but as far as I is concerned, nurses should always be sweet young things in flimsy uniforms! Not blokes! What would possess guys to take up nursing? Let's face it, guys are not disposed to a maternal instinct & are usually an uncaring lot.

Then it hit me - eureka! The stats are abso-fooking-lutely staggering - 120 gals to 5 guys? Fooking hell, there is NO FOOKING WAY these fookers NOT get laid!!! Shit, with those numbers even Quasimodo (or Luke Chadwick) would be a playah lah.

So, if your a young, pimply male ubërnerd with no sex life - JOIN A NURSING SCHOOL!

Monday, January 7, 2008

From Kenilworth with shame . . .

Outfought, outgunned & dare I say it . . . outclassed!

No, it wasn't Inter Milan we were up against but rather Luton Fooking Town. Yes, LFC were held to a 1-1 draw at Kenilworth this morning and after watching the game, me thinks Luton were fooking unlucky not to get anything out of the 3rd round FA Cup tie.

I cringed when hearing fellow Kopites brag about how Xabi was gonna score another from inside his own half; hope these fookers were awake to see the fooking shambolic display. We were CRAP! And this was against a club that is 4th from bottom in the League Championship, in administration & whose players haven't been paid in weeks!

Fooking hell, watching the game you'd be hard pressed to see any sort of Premiership quality from us; nevermind European contenders. Oh, the shame of it all.

Fer Rafa to put out another disjointed squad after being unceremoniously dumped out of the title running, I was fooking speechless. Rotation is fine if you can get the team to function, if not fooking swallow yer pride & fooking accept that the FA Cup may just be our salvation & allow you to keep yer fooking job!

At one point, we had four strikers on the pitch (three FULL internationals & an under-21 protege in the shape of Messrs Voronin, Crouch, Kuyt & Elzhaar) but could not muster a decent attack on the Luton goal. Our goal came courtesy of a defensive fumble & even then we needed several bites of the cherry to put it away.

As Luton gaffer Kevin Blackwell said before the game,"There is something not right at Liverpool . . ." Yes, the signs that Rafa is a dead man walking are ominous; much more than Jose was at CSKA London I would say.

As fer the Rafa loyalists, is this performance against a struggling Luton side what the RAFALUTION all about? And how do you expect the sceptics (like meself) to get behind the man when the footie on display is quite simply fooking shite?

Thursday, January 3, 2008

Another season gone . . .

It ain't over till the fat lady sings? Well, after this morning's turgid 1-1 home draw v the mighty fooking Wigan, she not only sang, but burped, farted & picked her teeth as well. After the busy festive fixtures where our "big squad" was supposed to come in handy, we're not only are 12 points adrift of the leaders but outside the top four as well.

Yes, I admit I am a hugely pessimistic fooker when it comes to me beloved Reds. This is due to two incidents which has scarred me fer life - Micheal Thomas & Lawrie Fooking Sanchez. Those two shocking winners (which denied us a double on both occasions) not only conditioned me to expect the worse but to look fer cracks in everything. To say I take nothing fer granted is putting it mildly! And I hate it when me dire fooking predictions are rite. It pains me no end!

Just like I was opposed to the Yank's takeover, I was shouted down as a short-sighted traditionalist. Now that our new stadium plans are in jeopardy & with a rift between them & Rafa growing, most fans are having second thoughts as well.

Yes, I can fully understand supporters wanting to be optimistic & dream a little. After all, our song says to "walk with hope in yer hearts". But I just want to underline the fact that I am not going to blindly cheer me team when its all fooked up. Many again had dismissed me suggestions at the start of this campaign that we were gonna be scrapping fer fourth despite the arrival of Torres & others. I just felt we were short of quality in too many positions; in particular out wide. Plus Rafa's mind-boggling tactics & team selections were also contributing factors (see v Reading, v Birmingham etc).

Come on people, every fooking season there's talk of a title challenge. Yet again after X'mas, we are a gazillion points of the pace & struggling fer champion's league qualification. You know how we laugh at the continued misfortune that engulfs Newcastle at every turn; among the so-called Big Four, we are turning into a similar caricature of a Football Club. Cruel joke & a fooking farce, mate.

How is this is even remotely acceptable? As usual, I look forward to hearing from all serious footie lovers on the current gloom surrounding Anfield. Wankers with nothing but cheap shots to fling, please fook off . . .

ps: The tattoo on me arm is indication of how intrinsically my life is linked to LFC. But again, it does not render me a blind follower . . .

pps: 18 years is a fooking long time fer a league title. We are in danger of emulating the Scum who took fooking 25!!!

Tuesday, January 1, 2008

Happy New Year!

Well, its the morning after & certainly hope yer party was as fun & fooking wild as the one above. No, I wasn't privy to the shenanigans above although Miss Siew Pau & friends were kind enough to invite me along. Its a sign of me increasing old age (& Unkerhood!!!) that I was a bit intimidated by these party animals. Me just sat at home & finished a bottle or ten of beer & fooking passed out before midnite . . . sigh . . . how fooking sad!

So here's wishing everyone a very happy new year from meself, wifey, Austin the Cocky Spaniel & Morris the dastradly Daschund!

ps: Pix above will be among those featured in a very special & limited edition of Fer Fook's Sake 2008 desk calender. Please place orders in comments box. Tq