Friday, November 30, 2007

Fooking Unbeliveable!


Absolutely fooking unbelievable this! Me colleagues showed me this fabulously-monikered person's business card & just couldn't resist sharing it with you guys. Just imagine him going up to somebody & saying, "Fook You, what's yer name?" Bet this poor bloke has had his share of black eyes & sore cheeks.

Let this be a warning to those who think that it is unimportant to grasp the finer (or should I say coarser) points of the English language.

This one betul-betul Fer Fook's Sake la, pecah perut.

On this lighter note, do enjoy yer weekend . . . and that goes fer you as well Mr Ng.

17 comments:

Bernard said...

If you're not careful, Mr. Ng will Fook You with a lawsuit for libel. Don't think I'll be able to help you much with your defence for such a suit, as I'll probably piss myself laughing all the time everytime I cross examine the bugger.

Me : Mr Ng?

Mr Ng : Yes?

Me : (In a loud voice) FOOK YOU! Is that really your name? (Piss myself laughing...)

Mr Ng : (with a heavy sigh) Yes.

Me : Can you spell out your name to the court?

Mr Ng : F-O-O-K Y-O-U

Me : Thank you & how do you pronounce it (tittering)?

Mr Ng : (Getting exasperated) Fook Yew-la!

Me : Now now Mr Ng, no need for you to be so rude. You are in a Court of law & may I remind you to mind your language and be courteous?

anfield devotee said...

Bernard: How am I committing libel? This is his card & I haven't said anything bad/wrong apart from the fact that he has a rather flamboyant name.

nick m said...

LOL!!! this is fooking hilarious! what a poor unfortunate sod. just as bad as someone named tai soh hai!

Mandeep Gill said...

LOL~~!!!

So bloody hilarious. poor fook you...
i wonder if there's a fook me or something out there... heheheh

Kopite78 said...

Reminds me of a police corporal I met after a car accident who only wanted to be known as Corporal Rama. After my dad's persistence he answer with a look of embarasment and answered KUNJI RAMA

Hahahahaha!!!!!!!!

At least Fook You is a chinese name. Kunji is a Tamil name with a Tamil meaning... WTF!!!???

@dam said...

Oh man! Sorry for Mr. Ng!

Really, we have to be fooking careful giving names to our children!!!

My mom's not far from Mr.Ng but still...GOOD YOU gave my friends a few rounds of laugh whenever they first heard!!!

anfield devotee said...

I know it is not quite on to laugh at someone else's misfortune but you would have thought he would have labelled his card FY Ng or give himself a Christian name like, I dunno, Dick?

Not laughed out loud like this fer quite some time. Fer what its worth TQ Mr Ng . . .

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

hahhahahha...fooking hilarious. imagine how many times he's had his friends making fun of his name. i mean, if i had such a name, i know i would get alot as my friends are bunch of retards who'd make fun of the slightest of opportunity given.

not sure if its as genuine as this one but i've got a picture of a street given in honour of someone by the name of 'fun wee fuck' posted.

anfield devotee said...

kerp: actually, I was showing me colleagues yer Fun Wee Fuck pix when one of em whipped out this card!


Ha ha!!!

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

so i guess a fucking name can be quite inspirational too huh...hahha..

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

aiseh, sorry bala...one more comment and i'm off i promise.

i was wondering to myself about this fooking name. personally i think there's some meaning to this fook word in mandarin or cantonese. the word 'fuck' in fun wee fuck i believe is promounced as 'fook'. so these mr ng and mr fun could well be of some similar clan or something. ok that couldnt possibly be but again, perhaps there's some meaning to this very interesting word.

just my 2 sens worth(less).

premo said...

Shit! Laughed so hard i nearly crapped my pants!! had to share this one with colleagues... I wonder waht his siblings are called? Fook Me? Fook In? Fook Err? Muahahahahaha!!!

anfield devotee said...

kerp: Yes, 'fook' in mandarin means 'blessed', brudder. Oh, the irony of it all . . .

premo: Fook Tat?

mozisgod said...

MWAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAAAA
MWHAHHAHAHHAHHAHHAHHAHHAHAHA
MWHWAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAAAAAAAAAAA

thank god..i was not reading..it while i was taking a leak...yes i piss sitting down..(so farkin what..sue me...besides its due to obscene obesity la)...

good one chief.cheers. for the bright lights & heads up on an otherwise..dreary..
mundane...a tad morose...
friday, saturday..AND
monday evening.

p.s. erhm..chief..i dunno..but may be should have sorta...blotted out the contact numbers on the card or something..dunnow..yu'know...was just wondering..since..uhm..considering the fact that.. i'm a no-lifer..and grew-up in a surrounding environment of no-lifers..couldn't help thinking...if it got into the hands of erh..some folks..folk like...e.g. my hometown crew.AKA..da-5KUpangdiddyTupai suthekilli-arse-tearing-nolifersinboredom of da-HOOD....*SOUTHSIDDEEE*.no..no..dun worry..not referring to sBan..*SOUTHSIDEEE*..how do the 'S' sign ah..cannot bengkok-bengkok finger oridhi la bro....the 'Pariah' (allo please pronounce it as puh-ruh-yawhh ok Crew of Kajang)..though we disdain the term..MIND YOU..IT IS OFFENSIVE..but even the righteous machas-with-whitesargeantstripes on the head & shoulders..have referred us..in that similar manner.. ..without a modicum of thought...(yes..yes i'm trying hard *sigh* to sound intelligent..but using words like modicum..come cum..and makemecum)...what's that..i know..i know..the practical mind will wonder...what have we done to deserve in the first place? how poignant. i guess we did shittin' plenty..
not tooutterly proud of it though...but it's been..uhm..thrown at us one too many times..so numbness abounds......whoah..dude..that just managed to squeeze its arse into an acronym..of P.C.K..dun play-play ah...now what was i saying..
oh yah..
the number...cunts like me my decide to call..and go..ALLO..FOOK YEW AH?..EH FARKER..THIS IS YOUR FARKING FARKED UP FREN FRANKIE FARKING FOO LA DUDE...
then again..yu have a point
it will be limited to
cunts like me.burp.
just a point to ponder.
because...if people main forward-forward..then uhm...i can't put the legal-like words la...lemah in inggerish vokesyenel.

p.s. anyway.it was a good one. in the words of premo..it was crapping funneee.

p.s. 2..DON'T TALK ABOUT FOOTBALL AHH CHIEF..DUN LA..OK..PLEASE..I'M ALMOST
IN IAN
CURTIS MODE
NOW.
i think he would have gone faster
had he been a
spurs fan.

mozisgod said...

Senor. A.Devotee,
c/o Broadwalk,
666,Jalan Memori Lagenda,
Off Persiaran Bukitsondol,
Poskod: 69696&9, Mudcity.Kay-Hell.

Dear Mr.Devotee,

RE: FATALLY-LAUGH-UNTIL-YOU-COUGH-BLOOD-INDUCING-SIGNBOARDS
boldunderlineboldunderlineboldunder

With regards to the aforementioned blognews i the undersigned dumbarse blogger would like to revert your kind attention the following interesting artifact while i was cilok-king my way amidst the swaying-lenggok-buntut- traffic of kuantan last week.

a traffic jam in kuantan? how preposterous.

[Note: Kindly fixate on separate cheeks of the bum swaying independently;almost altruistically and you will indefintiely approximate the aforementioned traffic prescribed.sorry.described above]
analagous traffic. not digital. catch my drift?

i came across this signboard of a regular hardware store which i have come to know is quite a popular supplier in this quaint town of the sunny/windy/beachy east coast. [Disclaimer: Rainy through Nov,Dec & Jan..and some say Feb]

To parapharase & prevent a further mental acidwash of an already non-sensical insult-to-intelligence of everyone sane & dandy write-up of what I am about to say.

i saw a singboard that read:
Syarikat Perniagaan Fook Yew
(Trans: Fook Yew Hardware).
[NB: The truculent salivafull scouse twannggggg attached to the fooookkk]
smack bang in the middle of town. corner lot. opposite the bak-kut-teh shop by the side of Megaview hotel along jalan besar..for those of you who are well acquainted with kuantan. For those who refer to kuantan as their hometown abode. i feel sorry for you and i understand. believe me. WE WHO ARE NOT AS OTHERS.BLEUARRGHHHHHHH.

i would have love to send you a snapshot. but here's the thing:
-i do not know how exactly to operate a digital camera;
-Upon snapping from a digital camera, i am not well versed to download/upload and leave my load on an usibi port; &
-Much to my chagrin, I do not own or one of them camera-phone thingys. This is mainly due to blatant and forceful action self-mutilative-restirctions imposed by me and on me, as I believe in my hands it will be subject to a vulgar disposition of upskirt abuse.

yes chief? yes, I will gracefully shut up now.

p.s. btw chief..need your encyclopediac insight on musicdom on something been bugging me for a long time..y'know that song..FRANKLY,MR.SHANKLY? by..ahem..the one & ONLY..referring to good ol' bill an chance?

yes, yes, i will shut up now.bye.

anfield devotee said...

moz: yes, morrisey is a bit keen on the footoe analogies - Roy's Keane, Your Arsenal etc.

Looks like Mr Ng has a few friends on the East Coast . . .

weiyin69 said...

What a name. Fook You! Ha ha. I'm sure there's someone out there called Tuck You ...